I’ve told you before- I can make anything about birth. Let’s get stuck into this…
You don’t have to win every game, or set, to win the match, or even the Championship.
This is totally true of birth. You do not have to tick every box on your birth plan, or fulfil all of your desires to win at it.
What’s a win? When you emerge feeling utterly in awe of your own capacity. You get there through solid preparation. Whatever happens, you know you were in charge, making decisions that were right for you and your baby.
Didn’t make it into the pool? Transferred in from home? Unplanned c-section? Of course you may be disappointed, that’s your right. But I hear from women time and time again that this is not what stays with them. They were autonomous, respected, supported. That’s what they remember. If you’re in this headspace, you enter into motherhood as your highest possible self- knowing that you can do anything. You’re winning.
Making noise is GOOD. Is anyone hearing the Williams sisters and saying, “Ooo, they’re not coping very well…”. NO. We see strong, powerful women, channelling their energy. It’s been shown that when a tennis player makes noises when striking the ball, they hit harder and faster than when silent, without additional strain on their bodies (sweating, pulse, etc).
We instinctively know that expressing ourselves grounds us to our experience and connects us to our power. Don’t be a good girl, keeping quiet for the sake of politeness. If you want to hum, or roar, do it. Check in with yourself- is it helping you? Or have you accidentally slipped into performing birth in the way you’ve been shown it your whole life? If it could be that, try focusing on breathing and movement instead. If it’s helping, keep going.
When I watch a birth video and hear a woman roar, you know how it translates to me? “I grew a human and now I’m getting it out of my body- is everyone getting the fricking magnitude of this? Watch me creating life right now- I m basically a God”.
Ok I could only think of 2 parallels. Was gonna try and spin women playing fewer sets as- it would take longer to birth if men had to do it, or something, but could’t really work it out.
To sum up- a positive birth doesn’t mean every moment was positive.If your experience takes a dip, get yourself back on track. Be defined by your resilience, rather than the compromises. And roar the place down. Make it known that you are doing something almost beyond belief. If it feels right to you, you will find yourself in warrior queen mode, and wonder how to stay there because it’s SO GOOD.
If you would like some birth prep that goes beyond Wimbledon ramblings, because you want to feel in control and confident, you can find info on our courses here and read birth stories from some of the families we’ve worked with here.
#doitlikeamother #positiveimperfectbirth #incredibleimperfectmothers