For a promotion, for a bigger house, for an easier life, for a huge opportunity, a collaboration, an investment in yourself, a compliment even… When you feel that initial, ooo could I? When your heart leaps and your eyes glaze over and you slip into dreaming about accepting the idea, just for a moment, UNTIL… No, I can’t. Not me. I’m not available for this joy, but if you’ve got 20 mins, please, take a seat and let me talk you through everything that’s wrong with me- all the reasons why I definitely don’t deserve it.
I get it. We are schooled our whole lives in perfectionism. Why? We bear witness to, and become a part of the eternal scrutiny of women’s choices. Their body shapes, the way they dress, their mothering, their lifestyle… And so we conclude, in order to be good enough, to be acceptable, tolerable even, I must do everything RIGHT. By the book. I must be selfless, prudent, restrained.
AND I must make it all appear effortless (natural look products left, right and centre anyone?) and never say a word about my sacrifices or my desires because heaven forbid anyone should think I’ not coping with this insanity when everyone else seems to be…
We imagine that the people who have the things we want are somehow ‘that sort of person’ and that we are not. We make up all sorts of stories about what we are allowed to access.
I’ll do yoga when my house is tidy… I’ll accept those lovely words when I’ve got better skin… I’ll invest in myself when I am debt free/ have finished renovating/ have made more money in my business/ when I can get the ok from my partner…
Life is too short for ‘later’ or ‘tomorrow’. If there’s something that is calling to you, that in your heart, you know would feel BETTER than whatever you’re doing right now, would you please take it? Again- THIS. IS. YOUR. LIFE.
Take time for yourself, create space for yourself, surround yourself with people who inspire you, spend time in environments that uplift you. Move your body. Find more meaningful moments. Grow. You’re READY FOR THAT. What else is life about?